On Friday my work took me out heavy drinking, it was excellent fun and very generous of them, but it also contained a very middle class disappointment for me. I ate a squid ring from the buffet only to find that the batter contained onion, rather than squid.
A few weeks ago I had a house guest, and we had two even more middle class experiences in one day: We drank overpriced, organically produced, Cornish grown tea in the café of a farm shop, and we were on the wrong end of a hard sell from the National Trust when we used one of their car parks.
The only way I can think of to have had a more middle-class relaxing weekend would have been to smoke a joint made of organically grown weed, broken up between my oak cheeseboard and a mezzaluna, rolled on the back of a large and valuable hardback book of fine art prints, and tipped with an specially produced unbleached roach torn from a little book.
Richard "never happened" B
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