Monday, 5 June 2023

Dog and Pony Show

 I'm not one of those houseproud people, so if I get guests without warning I'm usually embarrassed by unhoovered carpets or a large holding pattern of washing up.

 I'm also not one of those carproud people. I wash the car very carefully once each year so that I can put a coat of wax on it, and after that it gets a slapdash wash on the rare occasions that I can be bothered. At the weekend I unexpectedly exhibited it in a car show. The marshal on the gate persuaded me that I should exhibit rather than attend as they needed the support, it was the same price, and I would get a better parking space. The car was embarrassingly dirty. You could clearly see finger marks in the brake dust on the wheels from the last time I changed them. The front numberplate was pretty much illegible from dead insects. The bodywork was covered with a layer of dust, grime and tyre marks. Worse the dashboard still has a bits of masking tape with hand written checklists on them. It was displayed amongst very clean and well presented vehicles.

 I had, that very morning, taken some of the dead insects off the windscreen and headlights in a concession to road safety.

 Richard "chillin' in the car they spent all day waxin'" B

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