[Email. Richard Bredacted -> San Fransisco Judy. 13th January 2010]
I can't believe that you would casually ask me "What's new" this week. I had the weirdest weekend, and I took a woman out on what is probably the worst date in history:
I've been casually seeing a woman called
Redacted for about 3 months. We were getting on very well, going out for meals and drinks, staying at one another's house occasionally. We stayed in together on New Year's Eve. On Saturday I took
Redacted to the cinema, and then for some food. We went to the bar under the restaurant for a drink. In walked my ex-girlfriend
Ex (The one I brought to visit you, the one that I always think was most important).
Ex came over and started chatting to both of us. There was obviously some of the old chemistry left, and it turns out that
Ex is living in Plymouth and is single.
Redacted and I left the bar and walked to another place.
Redacted was a bit shaken at how well
Ex and I had been getting on (she showed us her new heart operation scars) and I was completely freaked out that she was back in Plymouth. I haven't had anything to do with her in about 5 years, and hadn't really thought about her in most of that time.
At the second bar I finished my relationship with
Redacted so that I could go back to the first bar and ask
Ex on a date. Of course by the time I got back there she had already left. Thankfully we had exchanged telephone numbers, and she returned my call the next day. To say that
Ex was shocked at what I had done is an understatement, but she agreed to go out for a meal with me on Monday, and we're going out again on Friday. Friday's date was her choice, and so I'm going to be taking her "heavy drinking". That used to be my favourite, but I'm completely out of practice now.
[Email. Richard Bredacted -> The Penny Pincher. 12th January 2010]
Pretty successful, all things considered.
We got on very well, chatting easily, laughing and joking, lots of reminiscing, tiny bit of flirting (I said it was the best first date ever because I was out with a beautiful woman, and even if it went nowhere, then I've still already seen her naked).
What was nice to hear is that when she looks back she always thinks that our relationship was the important one, like I do.
The problem is that she was completely cut up by what happened at the end, and she's never really got her confidence back, she blames me for the last several years of her life being pretty crappy. Moreover, since her latest operation she thinks that she looks so funny that she hasn't let a man anywhere near her.
We agreed that if anything is going to happen it's got to happen very slowly and cautiously, but we also agreed (and shook hands) to not go out with anybody else while we were finding out. I'm taking her out heavy drinking on Friday night, and we're going home separately to our own seperate houses.
I was compelled make a completely off colour joke: We had disgusting lemon liqueur after the meal. The waitress asked if we liked it and I said "not really". The waitress looked down into my empty glass and said "but you managed to force it down your throat?". Before I realized what I was doing I said to the waitress "Yes, and I'll be doing that to her later". Thankfully the waitress was so professional that she pretended not to hear me, and
Ex thought it was funny.
[Email. Richard Bredacted -> San Fransisco Judy. 14th January 2010]
Redacted is pretty upset and was crying on Sunday, but she's not completely in pieces about it and she does appreciate my openness and honesty. It wasn't very nice for her, but when we broke up she had heard every word that I had spoken to
Ex in the last 5 years and I had done absolutely nothing behind her back. When I told her that I was finishing it so that I could go back and ask
Ex on the date, I didn't even know what
Ex was going to say. I'm still on speaking terms with her, and we hope to remain friends. We're still going to a concert together on Sunday.
The date with
Ex was mixed. We got on easily and were laughing and joking and flirting. However she was completely cut up by what happened when we finished. She blames me for destroying her self-confidence, and pretty much ruining the last 5 years. She's also had another heart operation, and she thinks that the scar looks so funny that she hasn't let a man near her since. We agreed that if anything is going to happen between us it'll be done slowly and cautiously, and that we're not going to leap into bed together. She agreed that we need to find out if it's salvageable, and we shook hands on the idea that we wouldn't go out with anybody else until we had made that decision. I'm taking her out heavy drinking on a second date on Friday. I'm already nervous about it.
[Email. Richard Bredacted -> San Fransisco Judy. 25th January 2010]
Everything is pretty much as you guessed. On the night of the heavy-drinking date we were back at my house by 10.00 and spend most of the weekend in bed. Much more excitingly we've had another couple of less physical dates, and some long talks, and we're going to try to make a go of our relationship all over again. As of Saturday we are nominally boyfriend and girlfriend. I'm really excited and blissfully infatuated.